Mysterious

Someone asked me about Cuban bread.

I have no idea how to make it. I assume that if you make ordinary bread dough (flour, salt, water, yeast) and blend a little lard in and let it rise way beyond the normal time, you'll get Cuban bread. But I don't know.

I decided to Google a recipe, and Cooks.com came up. I HATE those schmucks. Have you ever tried a Cooks.com recipe? I have. What a mistake. They're always disgusting. I don't know why people who can't cook for shit insist on posting their lame recipes on the Internet. When one of my recipes sucks, I admit it, and I move on. As proof, I cite the case of the doughnut casserole.

Actually, it wasn't that bad.

The Cooks.com recipes have no lard in them. IDIOTS. And one of them--get this--says to GLAZE the bread. Glaze on Cuban bread. Right away, I can tell I'm dealing with vermin who sweeten their cornbread and boil ribs.

The near-famous Three Guys From Miami used to have a bread recipe on their site, but it's gone. I'll bet anything their cookbook has a fantastic version.

Here's a link to a plausible recipe: LINK. I may give that one a try. Of course, I'll Cuisinart the dough because I'm lazy.