Plus Beans

Today I did something that really hurt. I paid for Microsoft software.

Last night I was thinking, and I realized I was stealing from Bill Gates, and even though I consider him a pantload, and although he has taken money from me and failed to give me good value, I felt I had to do something. I use Office 2000, and the reason it's on my PC is that I got it while practicing law, via the firm. I figured it was the firm's responsibility to provide word processing software, so I didn't think I was to blame if I didn't get my own license. But that was quite some time ago, and I still use the software. I also have stolen Wordperfect 11, which is nearly useless, but I still have quite a number of Wordperfect documents I might want to open some day.

I went online today and found Word 2003 for like $45, and I was going to buy it. Then I saw it was OEM software. And I looked into it. Sure enough, it's illegal. The licensing language says the software is only intended to be used with new PCs. So there went that idea.

I finally found a new retail Office 2000 package for $149, and I bought the damn thing. Now I'm legitimate, and Bill Gates can kiss my ass. Of course, there has never been a time when Bill Gates was not welcome to kiss my ass. But now I don't have to say I steal his crappy software. I also found legal, retail Wordperfect something-or-other for $38, so I bought that, too. I don't know how they manage to sell the full non-academic non-OEM version for that price, but that isn't my problem. From now on, I'll upgrade relatively cheaply, as rarely as possible.

I know you now think I'm crazy, but stealing is stealing, even if you steal from Bill Gates. It's not that I think he deserves the money. It's a religious issue. I can't make my living writing books with stolen software. It's just wrong. Nonetheless, I really miss that money, and I did not enjoy paying. I don't like Microsoft, and I don't like being milked to subsidize unrepentant thieves. I know I overpay for all my software, because I'm supporting all you freeloaders out there. If everyone paid for Office, it would retail for fifty bucks instead of four hundred or whatever.

Well, no it wouldn't. Gates is Gates, after all.

I'm glad Vista bit him in the ass, and I would love to see Microsoft go under and be replaced by better companies. I believe Microsoft stifles competition and creates an atmosphere in which consumers get a narrow selection of inferior products at inflated prices. It's the Pepsi of software. And Apple...well, those people are just assholes. They began as assholes, and nothing has changed. It's an asshole cult.

I would have gotten some sort of open source crap, like the nerds always tell me to, but I don't want compatibility issues and all the other problems you get with obscure software. With Word 2000, I know what I'm doing, and I create documents easily, and everyone I send them to can open and edit them.

I don't think I have any other stolen stuff. Hmm...maybe Winrar. Sometimes I just forget to pay. Anyway, I'll make sure.

In other news, I'm cooking shucky beans today, from my own garden. I have a lot of them now, so I no longer feel like I have to hoard them. I wanted to see if they were any good, because some of them stayed green after they dried. Shucky beans are usually brown. I have them cooking with some fat slices of salt pork.

One thing I can't figure out is how to do a good job removing the strings from the beans. I try to strip the damn things out when I break the beans, but it seems like there are a lot of strings still in there. Anyway, later on I'll fix a couple of pork chops, and we'll see what's what.